Monday, May 30, 2005

The Canadian Universe

Today, Canada rules the Universe. No really, we won the Miss Universe Pageant. Okay, okay, actually Natalie Glebova won the title but still, she's Canadian.

Now of course with a Pageant, there is going to be controvrsy and those of you who've seen Miss Congeniality say it with me "it's a scholarship program not a beauty pageant". Of course, in the beginning it was. The girls would wear those really weird bathing suits and they would have 'hair out to there'. My theory about the hair is that they shaved their heads beforehand and wore wigs of horsehair to ensure that their 'bob and weave' wouldn't move around when they were performing or giving speeches or juggling flaming batons and other such cliche talents.

Canada has been present at the Pageant since it began in 1952, along with the USA, France and Germany. I couldn't find any information on how many times Canada has won the title but I'm assuming we have won it before?

So what does this mean for Canada? Are little children going to go parading around wanting to be the next Miss Universe? Are they going to expect semi-phenomenal, nearly cosmic powers to come with that crown? Will they want their parents to be court jesters? Will they expect chocolate to be brought at the snap of a fingers? It really makes you think. If you really could become ruler of the universe what would you do?

I think I'd put up a sign saying 'Space For Rent'. *snigger*

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